We are going to have a juicy conversation today. One of the big themes that has been coming up there is so much fear and scariness and edginess, and yet so much power and liberation, when we get comfortable as entrepreneurs embodying the full range, the full spectrum of our power.
Why do most women bring their range down?
What do I mean by this, when I’m talking about the full spectrum of your power, most of us as women are conditioned to and operate inside of, like, I would say, between 30 and 70%. If the range, let’s just call it zero to 100. Most of us operate in this 30 to 70% range, right? With most of the people that we interact with on the day to day and think about this when you go to a coffee shop, and like you just had a huge fight with your partner, or you just, you know, you’re grieving something, or you’re like over the moon and just signed a new client. Most of us don’t, when the coffee shop guy says like how you doing today, we don’t go to like level 100 And be like, oh, like I did this, and this is happening. And it’s so good. And most of us similarly, if we’re having a hard time, or not going to go to like the depth of our range with somebody that we just meet and like bear it all, we’re gonna probably keep it pretty temperate right in that 30 to 70% range. I’d love if you’re watching this, tell me the range number. Give me a number. Where do you most like to operate from? Where do you most find yourself operating from in your day to day. Now, when we bring this analogy of the range to entrepreneurship, it becomes so important to look at how we bring that very same conditioning, that very same story of either me at the top of my range, okay, me at the fullness, that unbridled, the unfiltered fullness of my capacity. A lot of us move through and that can bring up the fear of being too much, especially if we have been told received feedback. And I’m talking at any point in our lives, that we are too much that we are a lot. You better believe that I’ve been told that about myself.
And for those of us who have been told that it can feel really challenging to let ourselves go to that level eight, go to that level nine hell go to that level 10 Who am I to be this bold, this exuberant, this magnetic, this wealthy this hot, this successful, this happy? Who am I to be that woman who embodies all of those things? Because if I am shining at a nine or a 10 somebody else might be feeling really bad. Somebody if somebody else is at the lowness of their range, how irresponsible, How inconsiderate how inconvenient? How I mean, right? Like as women, we have so much of this shadowy sister womanhood baggage that we bring to the equation. And so most of us unconsciously bring our range down, we temper when we are feeling and our natural impulse is to be at that eight 9,10, which isn’t all the time like I’m not always in eight 9, 10. But a lot of the time I am my natural expression is very OTT over the top. And I love that about myself.
What happens when women bring down the fullness of their range
But if I’m not giving myself permission to embody the fullness of my power to play at the top of my range, what happens quite literally from a business perspective, from a marketing perspective, you are reducing the emotional surface area. I say this to clients all the time you’re reducing the emotional surface area that somebody can connect with you on. That’s not to say that you can’t find connection in the middle of your range you absolutely can. But when you are embodying the full In this of your expression you are in the raw exuberance. Think about how directly this connects how directly this analogy relates to being able like to falling in love, right? If you’re holding all of your emotional cards close to your chest and expecting to find that head over heels, oh my god, I see you baby I love you baby scoop you up Sunday morning kind of love. But you’re not in let you’re not letting yourself be seen at the edges of your range. It’s going to be hard for somebody to really fall in love with you, because they’re not really seeing you. The same thing you guys is true in business. If you are not allowing your people to see your goofiness, your unhinged pneus your your like fullness at the top of your range. You are missing out on so many soulmate client relationships like the ease let’s freakin talk about this has been such a theme with clients what is it freaking mean to let it be easy? letting it be easy means letting yourself be seen. letting it be easy is when you stop putting filters and barriers and blockades at level seven and let yourself go there. Let yourself say the thing let yourself be silly. Let yourself be exuberant.
Why operating in half of our range feels “safe”
Let yourself be over the top let yourself be gorgeous. Let yourself be magnetically yourself riff let yourself be too much for some people. Most of us don’t let ourselves go to eight, 9, 10 because that’s half of range feels unsafe. Because some where along the line we have been told that to operate at the top of our range means that we are putting other people down means that we are playing at a level that is not normal means that we are outshining somebody, when in reality, you’re people that you are here to connect with in your business, the people the relationships, your besties like it’s not just romantic relationships, the relationships that you are meant to go deep with. They want to be able to hold you and frankly, you want to be able to hold them. You want them to be able to see you at the top of your range and be like yes, this go off. Yes, it’s do the damn thing. Yes, Sister b you do you do it. I see you.
What happens when we’re at the bottom of our range?
Now I want to talk for a second about the bottom of the range. We did an exercise this morning in one of my masterminds it was so powerful it was called fire and water. Oh my God, it was so powerful, just profound, like women, small groups really practicing. Being at the top of range and bottom of range. It was stunning. Like we all cried, it was glorious and so transformative and powerful. What happens when we’re at the bottom of our range when something is feeling tender? When something is feeling vulnerable? When we’re inhabiting more of those depths, more of a season of alchemy more of a season of like, ooh, something is brewing and stirring and changing and shifting and moving. I can feel the tectonic plates beneath me changing. Most of us don’t publicize that, right? Because it’s not as sexy and yet, news flash, all of us as entrepreneurs, because we’re also all human. All of us have tectonic plates of our worlds, shifting all of us if we’re paying attention to what’s happening in our business, if we’re paying attention to our own souls evolution and growth, if we’re paying attention to what is calling us creatively. There is something pulling at the heartstrings of all of us there’s something moving at a deeper level. And yet, a lot of us again, isn’t it fascinating that to operate at either edge of our range, our vulnerability or depth our I don’t quite know how to put this yet but I feel something deep. Or our exuberance, our celebration, our our excitement, both have the label of being too much, right? You’re either too deep, too feely, to emote emotional to whatever or too much over the top like blah, blah, blah, at our depth, we are able that we can cultivate such profound resonance and our depth either in our vulnerability, or in our musing of when we’re in an alchemical process. In and of ourselves as leaders this has been a huge conversation that’s come up with clients recently of like boom, I all of my programs teach about this thing and yet, what is feeling most real and resonant and true for me? Is XYZ other thing. I don’t know how to talk about that to my audience. I don’t know how to share that because will people think it’s weird. Well, people think it’s random Will people feel like it’s one off? Will it like not align on my content calendar, because it’s not congruent with what I’m supposed to be selling, which is an EXE program. Here’s what I want to say to you, if you are tempering yourself, and and almost hammering yourself back to get back into the middle of the range, or, you know, we can also do the pendulum thing of, oh God, the depth feels terrifying. So let me just kick myself like a pendulum over to this high vibe, happy, happy land. But it’s not actually authentic.
Why business might feel hard for many female entrepreneurs
What we are doing you guys is creating emotional distance from our people, what we are doing is trying to manufacture a brand of visibility strategy, a content strategy, what we’re trying to do is manufacture a way of interacting. And that is why business feels hard. For a lot of people. That is why business feels hard. That’s why it feels like it’s not getting results. That’s why it feels like the algorithm everything’s changing, nothing’s working like it used to, I would actually say that what is happening is that people are becoming more discerning about what feels true. And for most of us, we, we most deeply feel what is most most truthfully expressed. And there is a lot of truth, there’s a lot of depth and soul, and a lot of fire and power that exists at the edge of our range. And if we cut ourselves off and tell ourselves to operate in this industry approved 30 to 70% of the range, we are cutting off so much emotional surface area for our clients, our community to be able to connect with us. We cut off so much opportunity for our people to connect with us and guys like this is what makes business feel hard. What I know to be true, what I have seen to be true countless amounts of times is that when we allow ourselves to go to the fullness of our range, it that in and of itself is a risk that in and of itself can feel so scary that in and of itself takes a tremendous amount of bravery and courage. But when we let ourselves go there, we blast ourselves open to connect with at a deep and resonant and instantaneous level with the people who most are going to want to work with us. It does not happen you don’t create resonance and ease and magnetism and fall from the sky clients by keeping yourself in that 30 to 70 box range. Hoping to say the thing that like appears on trend or is you know, in right now in the industry or whatever, not go there too much.
We have to cultivate enough emotional safety inside of ourselves to inhabit the fullness of our range. And when you do, congratulations, you are now at a new stage, a new level of thought leadership. This kind of leadership is the leadership that slices through the noise and instantly connects with people. When you do you are able to build that instantaneous I just found you but I want to like pay you in full because I freaking love you and I vibe with you. That happens when we let ourselves go to the fullness of our range, not when we are cutting ourselves off at the edges playing in the nice girl 30 to 70%. So I want you to ask yourself, Where are you cutting yourself off? From the fullness of your expression? Where are you hiding? The depth? The Alchemy the muck like and it’s not to say that you have to have your you know, Instagram being a living Dear Diary, but where are you not letting people into your process because you are afraid that you’re going to be rejected and how there’s obviously discernment around that and different layers of what your process is. But if it’s something related to entrepreneurship and what you coach on teach on, why wouldn’t you let people in because guess what your people are also building a business in the context of a life an uplevel and evolution.
Let yourself go to the depth. Similarly, if you are writing on cloud nine, if you’re on fire, if you are feeling yourself if you are celebrating it why would you not let people in and let people see that and let people feel you in the fullness of your fire? Because when you do you give you blaze a trail for others, you light up a path that allows other people to see be their own magic their own fire their own permission to freakin go for it. Why would you not let that be seen? I want you to ask yourself, Where am I cutting myself off? From the bottom notes of my range, the top notes of my range? What does it look like to remove those barriers? If this has resonated for you today, I want you to actually reflect on this, I want you to ask yourself, What am I going to do about it? You may or may not have seen me talking on stories. I mentioning this very briefly, this is something that, for me has been profoundly resonant. And this theme of exploring our range, it’s come up with so many different clients, I facilitated something on it today and rise because it is so in my field. And I sense and I know that for many of us in this space, breaking into that fullness of our range is truly the next evolution of leadership, of wealth building of ease creating in business. It’s the thing that everyone’s looking for. And yet everyone wants like a quick fix and solution, and I’m telling you the fix. It’s in the margins, it’s in the edges of your range. If this is something that you feel called to explore if this is resonating in your bones.
If you’re like whew mama like, yes, that part right there. I invite you to send me a DM about leadership. Leadership is a two week immersion with me, I have only a couple of spots for these you guys. I’m feeling like I said, I’m doing this work with so many of my clients right now. And I am witnessing in lifetime just to like, clear out. And just this volcanic eruption of momentum that comes when we allow ourselves to explore these edges, why we’re not going there in the first place, what it means emotionally, energetically, but also practically in content and marketing, in the way that we show up what it means to inhabit these edges. If this is work that you know would benefit you. Send me a DM about leadership. You can just say leadership, I want more details. It’s a two week Voxer immersion with me. And this is the thing that we’re going to be exploring. You get me in Voxer, privately supporting you, as you go into, what is that this edge of your range? What is that this edge of your range? And what are you here to birth to share to say, if you have been wondering what it looks like to have my support directly in your business, this is such a beautiful opportunity. Certainly the last thing like this I’m going to be doing before maternity leave. And I’m only taking a couple of clients for this. And has to be the right fit. So if this is resonating for you, if you’re like oh my god, this is so juicy. Send me a DM to learn what this looks like. I’m so so inspired by the women who are raising their hand doing this work because it is it is the work that clears black stagnation, lack of momentum. Things aren’t where it’s what brings in that is the permission to inhabit that fullness of the range and the practice of doing so. That’s what’s also so awesome about boxer like this is not just like hi do these four steps. It’s like hey, on the daily like, what’s coming up? Where are you hiding out on yourself. So, again, if you want more information, send me a DM with leadership I will share with you this is a one time thing. And I’m so excited to support you in embodying inhabiting and expressing from the fullness of your range. It’s where leadership lives. It’s the brave space and I’m so excited to walk with you there. Thank you guys so much for tuning in today. Love to hear from you. If you listen to this episode, what your biggest takeaway was you can send me a DM I always love spending the time with you guys, and I will talk to you very soon. Bye beauties.
