Born to Rise Podcast Ep 115

Episode 115. How To Handle The Fear Of Your Own Power & The Bigness Of Your Desire

Episode 115. How To Handle The Fear Of Your Own Power & The Bigness Of Your Desire

Hello, and welcome to today’s episode of The Born To Rise Podcast. I’m your host, Cait Scudder. Today we are going to be talking about what to do when you are afraid of your own power when you are feeling stuck. And the up-level is really about getting out of your own way and letting yourself soar. 

This has come up with a bunch of different clients recently, and this is the sabotage that comes in when we are in the process of an uplevel. One of the really sticky pieces that can come in is the fear of our own growth, the fear of really going big, the fear of just how big we actually want to go, the fear of what we know that we are destined for. What we know is possible for us, what is available, and just out of reach. 

We’re going to be talking today about how we keep ourselves in that cycle of how we keep ourselves feeling like we’re constantly falling short of our goals of our dreams of our desires of the results that we want. How to unhook from that cycle, and really let yourself tap into unlimited capacity to receive to earn to impact all of the things. 

So I was talking to a client this morning. One of my amazing clients, she’s a badass freaking boss, multiple six-figure earner just slaying it. We were talking about fearing our own growth. And what happens when the fear of our own growth gets really loud, gets really overwhelming, gets really causes us to go through the motions and act like we’re playing big, but not actually go all out? Have you been there? Have you been in a place where you’re like, Okay, I know what I’m supposed to be doing. I’m launching a program or I’m running this thing. Let me write the post. Let me do the live streams, let me post the things and be visible. 

But inside internally, there’s the fear of if I really let myself and my energy be present right now if I really let my full presence and potency and wisdom and embodiment and unleashed power come through right now, if I let that most unleashed potent power come through right now, I’m actually afraid of that. On the other side, I’m afraid of the growth that’s waiting for me on the other side. 

I think so many of us have been there. I’ve been there. We were talking about what happens when we get into these moments, right? When we feel an uplevel coming, we feel a huge wave of expansion coming. And it’s a little bit scary, right? Anytime we put ourselves into a situation where anything is possible. We’re getting anything that we want as possible. I’m just thinking back in my personal life, moments of feeling like I’ve put that vulnerability on the line and everything is about to open. Everything’s about to blossom. So much is about to be able to come true and it feels super scary and safer actually to retreat, right? Because we can’t be in a state of growth, a state of expansion, a state of elevation, and a state of protection at the same time. It’s one or the other. Growth is scary. 

The Difference Between Acting Like A Ferrari & Pretending To Be A Honda Civic

Growth asks us to meet a new edge of ourselves that we have not yet met. And the analogy that I shared with this client on this call, I was like, babe, you are a Ferrari. Stop pretending to be a Honda Civic, you are a fucking Ferrari. I think that is true for each and every one of us, right?

You are a Ferrari. But in the moments that you are too afraid of your growth, you’re too afraid of what’s going to happen on the other side, you are acting like a Honda Civic. Let’s talk about the difference between acting the Ferrari that you are, or pretending to be a Honda Civic because here’s the thing. It is safer to drive a Honda Civic than it is to drive a Ferrari. Seemingly. 

Ferrari’s go fast. Ferraris drive attention. Ferrari’s have all eyes on them. It feels safer to drive a Honda Civic. But here is the lie, right? The lie is if I’m driving this Ferrari, I’ve got more to lose, right? Honey, you have insurance, it’s fine, you’ve got more to lose, you’re driving something bigger and expensive. I think for clients who are up-leveling and getting to this place –and this can happen on the most subliminal level –we can self-sabotage and not even recognize that we’re doing it. 

How many times have you been there, right? You’re in a sales conversation. And there’s a part of you that’s like, I don’t really know if I can help this client or I feel kind of weird about this new price point. So we’re sort of half in, we’re going through the motions with our sales process, so that and when it doesn’t convert, we can say, See, look, it’s just not working. When really, if you were in your full, unapologetic potent Ferrari energy, that sale would have been a no-brainer, that sale would have closed. We know what would have happened with that. 

But there is some part of you afraid of that growth, afraid of the voltage, the wattage, the full power, horsepower, of being the Ferrari that you are. It doesn’t make you bad. It doesn’t make you wrong, it makes you human. So if that’s been you, and you’re having this lightbulb moment, that’s okay. What I want to remind you of right now is finding the emotional, the nervous system, the energetic the vibrational feeling of safety and trust being the Ferrari that you are. Being fully expressed being fully embodied being fully powerful in the way that you execute and show up in your energy in your frequency on the day to day in your business, in the goals that you set in the in the ambition that you have. 

Filling The Gap Between Energy & Execution

Because where I see clients when there is a gap or a stagnation or something that comes up.  sometimes there is something externally off, like a launch that doesn’t make sense or whatever, but 99 times out of 100 there is a gap between energy and execution if the strategy is set, and it’s really tempting to think no, the strategy is wrong. If you have a strategy that’s going to get you to that Ferrari result, but you’re showing up in the energy in the frequency of a Honda Civic, we’re not going to get Ferrari results baby girl. I’m sorry, that’s just the way that it is. 

Again, this isn’t about making it bad or wrong. If you’ve done that we’ve all been there. What this is about is highlighting our attention and our energy back to what actually moves the needle in business, what actually makes a difference. What actually builds momentum, builds results, builds a community, builds so much ease in your business that it gets to keep happening over and over and over again. 

I know that it feels scary to own. What is the biggest fear that you have about embodying that Ferrari energy of stepping into that level of growth and impact? Maybe it’s the fear of failing, maybe it’s the fear of being big, being visible, going big and not being able to repeat it and failing publicly. Maybe it’s the fear of, if you embody that Ferrari energy you’re gonna make all the other Toyota Camry and Honda Civics in your life feel bad or feel inferior. This fear of being big and taking up space? More on that soon. 

Those are all fears that come up when we shine bright when we Excel when we are exceptional, phenomenal, gorgeous, talented. Taking up space talking about money. I know the first time I started talking about money online. It was like, Whoa, who does this girl thing she is? She was a teacher. She’s just a helper. She started a literacy program in Costa Rica. Cait doesn’t talk about money online. No, that’s not the thing, right? 

This is a question I want you to answer for yourself, where are you letting an old identity of you, somebody else’s identity, somebody else’s perception and projection of who you are and what gets to be true for you? Where are we letting that identity constrict you and hold you back from becoming an embodying who you already are? Which is a freakin Ferrari? Where are you letting it hold you back? Where are you letting it stop you from being in the full, magnetic, potent, powerful, unapologetic, human that you are? 

Guess what? This is where it is really interesting. Because all we want for our clients, we want clients who know where they’re going, they’re ambitious, they’re self-responsible, they find a way they make it happen. They’re energized. They’re just in this really potent place. And yet, where we come up against the thing is, I wonder where all these people are? Why aren’t they showing up when you embody? 

Why Your Business Is A Mirror Reflection Of Yourself

This is just a shift that I have witnessed in my own business, a shift that I’ve witnessed in the businesses of my clients. Everything starts with you. Okay. And this is not narcissistic, the world revolves around me sort of thing. This is about your business being biggest personal development experiment that you could ever be in, right? Everything is a mirror, reflecting back to you, what you believe, what how you feel, how you feel, how you what your internal reality to look like, what that experience of being inside of your business is. That is what we get reflected back to us in the people that we attract. 

So if you are in a Honda Civic energy, trying to manifest and call in Ferrari clients, this is not just about status or how much money people make. No, this is about the energetic committedness. It’s all in how they show up. Right? If we are doing this dance, where we’re wanting to go big, but don’t really trust ourselves, we’re feeling the expansion in the call, but then hold ourselves back kind of half-assed it in the energy and execution sort of do this cat and mouse thing. That’s when we start to call in clients with a lot of objections. That’s when we start to see this wishy-washiness, because it’s all a mirror. 

So I want you to ask yourself, truly, honestly, deeply where in your business are you embodying an energy that downplays the power that you hold? Question number one. Question number two, what about big growth scares you? You’re big doesn’t have to be my version of big. We are all on our own perfect journeys. This isn’t about you have to build an X figure business in order to be happy. Now, you might be super freaking happy with making $100,000 a year. That might make you super lit up. Some of you might be like I want to make $100,000 months. Some of you might be  I just want to make 70k a year, replace my salary, be happy. This isn’t about you have to chase 70k, a year, a seven-figure year whatever this is about. 

What is your version of big? What is your version of growth? What is your edge your current edge? What are you stepping into? And what about that scares you? Because when you can identify what it is about that next bigger iteration of yourself, maybe it’s the judgment of friends and family, maybe it’s the fear of public failure? Maybe it is the fear of I’m not going to know enough. What am I going to do if I have a client who is attracted to me? Because my business starts to grow? And I have a lot of momentum, but I can’t actually help them. What then? What am I going to do in that instance?

Imagine if the doctors of this world use that logic, we would be, pardon my French, we would be fucked. If the doctors of this world said I’m super scared about having to do surgery and not being able to save that person. So it’s better that I just don’t practice medicine at all. Literally that’s the logic that we would that would perpetuate doctors not being a thing because what if they failed? That risk is always going to be there. 

The risk of growth is choosing the desire that you want the thing that you are growing into over the status quo and the thing that you are growing out of that you know you do not want. So you tell me what is the greater risk? If you are discontented in a Honda Civic life if you’re a freaking Ferrari, you’ve got the key dangling in your fingertips. All you need to do is put it in the ignition, put on your freakin sunglasses, buckle up, and get ready to drive the Ferrari that you are. 

What is the bigger fear? Complaining, staying stuck, not enjoying driving that Honda Civic. or feeling the velocity, the potency, the power of the engine that you are stepping into that next level iteration. Here’s what I can tell you. When you rise, when you upgrade, when you elevate, it is uncomfortable. When you go to a new car, you’re gonna have to learn to calibrate to that different level, that different frequency. But when you do this, you get used to it. You become accustomed. This becomes your new normal. And isn’t this what you want? Isn’t this what you were calling in? 

So do not let the fear in the story and the projection and what if I can’t do this? And what if this happens. You will figure it out. Because you know how to drive. Because you know what it is you’re doing. No matter how much, there’s a story in you that says I don’t you actually know what you’re doing. Where are you afraid of your own power? Where are you afraid of your own growth? Where are you choosing what you know, even though you don’t love it, and it is too small for you? Where are you choosing that over the next level activation of picking up your Ferrari key and putting it in the engine buckling up and going for a ride? 

This is entrepreneurship and it is a beautiful game. It’s a game where we get to meet ourselves, where we get to observe our own contraction, our own bullshit, our own stuff that holds us back. And we get to choose another pathway, we get to choose our own adventure situation. It’s literally the beauty and the terror of this is that it’s in your hands. It’s in your court. The balls in your court. 

I’m using so many different analogies right now. But truly, the ball is in your court. Which keys are you going to pick off the table? What story are you going to write about who you are and what your power gets to be? What’s the narrative that you are going to allow your growth to have over you? Is it the narrative of I am just there. They’re a Ferrari, people look at her. She’s a Ferrari girl, she gets to have a Ferrari life because everything worked out for her.

How To Rise Through Your Fear

I can tell you right now that there was no Ferrari inheritance over here. This is about choosing your own adventure, choosing what gets to be true for you, choosing the narrative, the story of your life that you want to be real, and embodying that energy. Looking at the terror of your own growth in the face, and saying, you know what? I’m gonna rise anyway. Because the fear of not rising the fear of staying in a life in a business in a reality and an income in an impact in a career that is too small for me is more terrifying than what? I don’t know. How many times as a kid, were you afraid of the dark? I was afraid of the dark. I used to have my mom count at the top of the stairs when I would go down into the basement. We had an unfinished play area in the basement I used to have her count at the top of the stairs. One, two, and I would run down into the basement and I would be getting my things and wanting to hurry up. I was so scared of the dark. I was scared of the washer and dryer down in the unfinished basement. I was scared that they had jaws and we’re going to eat me and it’s actually really sweet to think back to that now and think Ella is gonna hopefully not have those scary thoughts. 

But the things we invent as kids, right? We’re scared of the dark. But we’re not actually scared of the dark. There’s nothing inherently scary about the dark. We’re scared of what we can’t see. We’re scared of what we don’t yet know. We’re scared of the things that could be out there. And just as a scary monster could be out there in the dark to get us. 9 times out of 10 that’s not the case. 9 times out of 10, it’s literally just the same reality, different lens. Different lighting. 

It’s the story that we superimpose on it that stops us from even entering that room. Do not let the fear of your growth and the fear of the unknown stop you from doing what you were born to do. And it’s not just about doing what you were born to do. It’s not just about taking up space and posting the content and launching the program and whatever. It’s about doing it with the energy of I am here, this is happening. This is going to work, I am magnetic, I am potent. I am powerful. And the work that I am here to do in this world is of extraordinary value. To have extraordinary value in service. 

I’m not needing anything, I just know that it’s all coming to me in abundance. Money, financial success, dream clients paid in full clients, women who make it happen. Women who are more committed to their growth than their own excuses because that is the energy that I am bringing to my business to my work day in and day out. 

What I want you to know my love is that you are a Ferrari, you may feel you’ve been in a bit of a Honda Civic rut, but baby, you are a Ferrari. Own it, embody it, embrace it, and get ready because it is all coming to you. I love you guys so much. I hope this has been impactful. I hope this has lit something up inside of you that changes not just what you do, but how you do it. Because it’s the energy with which you do the things not the things themselves that create results that generate momentum that make it happen.

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Hey, I'm Cait!

Boss mama, wife, and 7-figure CEO empowering women to build profitable, purpose-driven businesses that change the world.

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